Okay, it's past the holidays so I'm safe on this one, right? Just... please forgive me...
Rudolf The Red-Nosed Hit Man
by
Mark Anthony Tierno
You know Slasher and Dander, and Strumpet and Fixin’
Con Man and Cueball, and Vomit and Nixon.
But do you recall,
The most famous Hit Man of all?
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Hit Man,
Had a very shiny gun.
And if you ever saw it,
You would turn around and run.
All of the other hit men,
Never let him out of sight.
They never trusted old Rudolph
Especially dead at night.
Then one foggy Val-en-tines,
Scar Face came to say.
Rudolph with your gun so bright,
Please off those guys tonight.
Then how the hit men dropped dead,
Followed by the cops and all that jazz.
Rudolf the Red-Nosed Hit Man,
You’ll spend life in Al-ca-traz.